Now is When it Hits

Now is when it hits.

As of this week, I am no longer an observer in the world, soaking in whats and hows and whys, or learning, training, practicing. Today, just as many of you have already done, or soon will do, I become in actor in the world performance, not asking the questions, but answering them.

There was no sudden shift in gravity to mark this event, no seismic, or cosmic upheaval. I suppose there is a little party, a black gown congregation, a long wait for a short hurrah. But there’s no demarcation in demeanor, nor flux in feeling. It is all the same.

Because there is no single moment when questioner becomes answerer. There is no unitary moment in time that I can point to and say, “AHA! That is when I truly became an adult!” These types of moments don’t exist; instead we slowly begin to answering the questions instead of constantly asking them. First, we delve into our own, answering within rather than seeking advice without. And slowly, we come to realize that others around us ask the questions we once sought to answer, we can now answer them, rather than wondering the same. Until one day we find ourselves giving the lectures, doing our best to satiate the curiosity of the youth that sit before us.

Of course, that isn’t to say that adults have some sort of mysterious question-answering secret power. Far from it. Rather, it’s a feeling that those around you can no longer adequately answer the questions you have about the world. You’ve expended your resources, used up your quota, and now, it’s up to you to provide the answer.

It’s more than that of course – we’ve also been given the tools to answer our inquiries rather than seeking out those that have already found the answers. One of the great gifts of an engineering degree, far greater than the big, bold letters printed on a piece of paper (or, dare I say it, the well-paying job), is being taught in a certain way of how to think about problems and formulate solutions. One of the great secrets of the engineering disciplines is that it in the end the education is so little about the source material. Whether you are learning how to build bridges, design heart valves, or concoct new chemicals, the true value of an engineering degree is understanding the problem-solving and design processes.

And, much as I hate to admit it, it’s not really even about the engineering degree – the liberal arts, as much as they are derided in the late hours within engineering buildings across the country, are taught many of the same things. How to think, how to form questions about the world, how to go about forming answers, and then communicating those findings back to the world – whether they’ll admit it or not, those psychology and sociology and economics majors are learning the scientific method, albeit with a good deal more hand-holding and arm-waving. The main difference is where the insight comes from – in the arts and sciences, more often than not its a combination of observation and intuition - something, I might add, is sometimes sorely lacking amongst the slide rules and pocket protectors we engineers hold dear.

The final piece of the puzzle in this metamorphosis is the self-awareness to recognize that we do not have the ability to answer the questions that we come across. That instead, we need the help, or the hard work, or the advice of others to accomplish our goals. The difficulty teaching (and learning) this skill is that it not only requires the ability to ask the right questions to the right people, but also the humility to recognize that there are things in this world that you cannot accomplish on your own.

And so now is when it hits. That feeling, as many before me have felt, of being prepared for some measure of greatness; yet at the same time, there’s a sense of gravity. We few – and as big as the classrooms have felt at times it still is a rather remarkable few – who have been granted this wonderful privilege of being educated in a way to make a difference in the world.

And, for better or worse, what a difference we shall make.